May 27, 2004

This date holds so much for me.

I was in the car with my mom driving to Bowling Green when I got the call.

One of my dearest friends had just passed away due to ovarian cancer.

I knew it was coming. In fact, she had held on so long that we were all at the point of praying that the Lord would go ahead and take her home. As hard as that was to pray - it was harder to watch her suffer. And linger. And fight.

Brooke Hall was a fighter. That's for sure. If that's one thing she taught me, it was how to fight the good fight. She fought the cancer two years. Two years longer than what was expected for the rare form she had. It was aggressive, but it couldn't beat her. In the midst of surgeries, chemo, radiation, trips to doctors, medications, throwing up the entire way from Louisville to Bowling Green - she never gave up. In fact - I don't believe any part of her ever thought of giving up. She still lived on campus at WKU. Remained an RA in the dorms. Took chemo treatments while taking care of other students.

Her heart was so big for others she often counseled others in the shadow of her own pain. But one would never know.

Five years.

Five years without Brookie.

It doesn't seem like it's been that long. Yet it seems so long ago since she's sat across from me. Twirling her curly hair. Pushing her crooked glasses up her nose with her cheek. Walking up behind me and poking my side - which would then cause a reaction termed "do the Amber." Her laugh, her no-nonsense attitude, her love, her joy, her passion for Christ and that others would know Him -- Man she is so missed!

And here I am, a photographer that doesn't have any pictures available to post of her just yet. I'll get to that though. Soon.

Brooke taught me so many lessons. So many.

Even as she laid in pre-op before her second surgery she spoke truth of her Heavenly Father and what He was teaching her. That even though her future was uncertain, we don't choose our paths, God has chosen our path for us. Whatever path that is. And wherever He leads us, we are firmly held by Him. She had such peace in that truth. As she told us this, she spoke of this song that touched her so much in that specific time in her life. It's by Ginny Owens.

If You Want Me To

The pathway is broken
And The signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to

Chorus:
Cause I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
so if all of these trials bring me closer to you
Then I will walk through the fire
If You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'd never go alone

ya oh oh no

So When the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through
And I go through the valley If You want me to

What a great lesson to learn. We never walk through the valley alone.

We will be celebrating her life this weekend and I cannot wait! How sweet it will be to come together, share stories, laugh, cry, eat Brookie's favorite foods and remember one who the Lord used to impact our lives in amazing ways - which for most of us dramatically changed our lives and brought us all closer to our Father.

Oh Brookie! You are missed so much at times that it hurts, but we all know that your thoughts, your focus and your heart is in a place with the Lord that we can only half-way imagine about right now. I miss you, but I wouldn't bring you back. Instead, I look forward to the day I get to join you in constant praise of our Father who brought us together in the first place!

I pray I can live my life even half-way the way you did - and bring glory to God while I'm here.