Search Me, O God, And Know My Heart

Thanks to some caffeine and a really achy back, I find that I cannot fall asleep yet, so what better time than now to update this thing : )


I have recently discovered the joys of Reformation Heritage Books (I love to read and I absolutely love books!!) So I ordered a new one titled "The Christian Lover" by Michael Haykin. Don't worry, it only sounds scandelous but it is a collection of love letters between husbands and wives from such Christian forefathers as Calvin, Luther, and a few others. I've read just a bit of it but loaned it to some friends who I know would enjoy it. (I am eyeball deep in studying Anatomy & Physiology and knew I needed to remove any literary temptations right now : ) I will treat myself to reading it after my next exam.)

Anyway, the reason I brought this up was because with my order came the RHB newsletter. The cover featured an article titled, "The 'Humble' Side of Sin" and had some good stuff in it:

"For both the skeptic and the Christian, the neglect of the indwelling evil stems from the same source: the very sin overlooked. one of Satan's strageties is to draw our attention to evils outside of us so that sin can have its grand work unhindered where it does the most damage. Sin is like a mastermind that gets its job done without attracting attention to itself. It is most successful when attention is not on itself. Sin could almost be considered humble, were it not for its corrupting abuse of virtue."

"We must not be satisfied with pointing out the evils around us. We must also do the hard work of crying out with the Psalmist, "Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Psalm 139:23-24.

I think all too often, and I know in my own life, it is so easy to see the evil and sin that surrounds us whether in the workplace, our family, TV, or society in general, and dismiss or completely overlook our own sin.

This was made very evident in just the past few days when a situation arose that presented a lot of temptation to take my focus off the Lord and on someone else. When talking to a friend I pointed out that I saw the timing in this situation and the red flags were going up that it would not be a good thing - but was nothing more than Satan attempting to play into to a fear of mine. I said, oh so arrogantly, "I scoff in the face of Satan!"

How dare I!?!?!??! How dare I be so arrogant as to think I have one-up on Satan and am totally immune to sin. And now, before I knew it, I found myself in the very position I didn't want to be in, and praying for wisdom on how to undo the situation, while also repenting of the horrible arrogance that plagues me on so many levels.

"Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Psalm 139:23-24.

I am so unbelievably thankful that the Lord continues to teach me, show me my sin and move me to repentance.

Lead me Lord, in the way everlasting.

This post leads me to my next possible book purchase: The Doctrine of Human Depravity by Arthur Pink. It looks like a good one.

Grace and Peace.